Month: May 2019

The Pain Of Miscarriage.

D'EbiLeave a comment

I don’t want to talk about this as it reminds me of the pain I suffered due to two miscarriages.

You never forget the children you never had. Those lost in still birth or via miscarriage.

So when I learnt that my younger sister had preeclampsia I prayed and waited, hoping that both she and the baby will somehow make it.

It was not to be. Sadly an emergency CS had to be done as it was clear her life was in danger.

She got married at 39, sadly she had a Broken relationship later in life which meant that she met her now husband at 39. She got pregnant almost immediately but, she suffered a loss at 12 weeks.

Then began the 3 year wait to get pregnant again, just as she was about to embark on fertility treatment she fell pregnant.

We were elated and watched as she blossomed. She was diagnosed with pre-eclampsia at 26 weeks.

Her blood pressure had raced through roof. Sadly this affected the placenta as a the baby was unable to get vita nutrients. At 28 weeks no heart beat was detected.

Miscarriage It a very lonely and isolated experience one only spoken about once we have a happy ending.

I spoke with her during and after it all. She was heart broken and confused, she was almost there. This pain is like on other.

After a few days she’s starting to come to the realisation that she’s not going to be a mum this year, that she will feel a pang of pain whenever she sees a pregnant woman.

She’s grateful for the encouragement she’s received so far.

I told her not to give up.

I asked the Lord to help heal and give her strength to bear the loss and replace her morning with dancing again.

She feels she should have done something different, anyone who’s suffered miscarriage feels like they should ha e done something. .

High blood pressure which was over 190/120 is no ones fault I told her.

I am hopeful and pray that she will come through this somehow and have a happy ending eventually.

For He makes all things beautiful in His time.

Your Partner in Hope

D’Ebi

Relevant post.

https://faithfulwait.com/2019/05/15/purpose-in-pain/

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Purpose in Pain

D'EbiLeave a comment

Sometimes suffering takes us to a place we never expected and in the process we may find our true purpose.

Going through infertility led me where I am today, while I am still finding my purpose I can say i am on the right path.

I was touched recently on reading the stories of those whose fertility journey did not have the ending they hoped for.

Those who remained childless and gave up trying either for health reasons, age related reasons or the unbearable pain and heart ache infertility brought.

These all fought and have sadly ended their fight.

One friend I know decided to stop trying at 50, for health reasons. She had under gone lots of IVFs which left her health worse than when she began.

I first knew there was something special about her when we met.

There was always a smile behind her eyes masking years of pain. A tenderness about her that immediately puts everyone at easy, a softness in her look that speaks peace.

Her story of trying and failing ended with her having a deeper personal experience with her maker, she later got a job helping to care for sick babies. It was during a chance encounter that led her to what she called her true purpose.

Her job made her realise how deep human emotions runs and how useful she could be to humanity. She has channelled all her motherly love to tender and care for these little “Angels”.

Her job has strangely has brought peace and the hurt she felt is now replaced by sweetness and gentleness only those with a good spirit can boast of.

Her story may not have ended with a child but it continues and she found her true calling and purpose and in so doing found joy and worth.

Her pain led her here where she is today.

My encouragement-to you today is

to find your purpose in your pain. It may seem the furthest thing from your thoughts right now while facing infertility, miscarriage or loss of a child.

As you journey on, keep your eyes on the master, ask him for vision for the future and purpose in this pain.

There’s still hope, thought all may seem lost, keep your gaze on the master

His purposes will unfold in time.

Your partner in Hope

D’Ebi

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