The age question.

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Yesterday’s post was about how the promised Christ was born 680 years after His birth was foretold.

Today I want to talk about another promised child Issace.

Abraham was 75 year old when God told him he will be a father of multitudes.

Becoming a parent at 75 in today’s world will be considered irresponsible, selfish, foolish, headlines screams “stupid”.

Our world have certain ideas and expectations of when our body should reproduce, never mind the wonders of technology, pregnancy over 40 is almost a taboo, let alone at 50,60 etc.

So for Abraham and Sarah to become parents at 100 is mind boggling to me.

Consider Sarah for a minute, she laughed when she heard the angel spoke of her being a mother. Sarah has written herself off, she knew she was pass her child bearing age, so that suggestion was not one she considered possible.

That laughter was load. It was doubt, it connotes the ridiculousnesses of the thought, it was filled with resignation.

But God fulfilled his promise to Abraham and Sarah and by so doing, paved the way for the Christmas promised “Christ”.

Because Jesus was from the linage of David who is a descendant of Issac.

Hope deferred makes the heart seek, says proverbs. simply put, the longer it takes, the more despondent we become.

I am not asking you to have children at 70, but to look at what is possible and what God can do.

You may have gone past what is considered to be the worlds ideal for child bearing age and have resigned yourself to not happening children.

God can heal, he turned Sarah’s womb and touched Abraham’s body – He can restore loss hope and bring a greater return than expected. Like Sarah and Abraham He can bring that long awaited promise to be.

If God can do it for Sarah, he is the same

Just as Sarah’s disbelief didn’t stop the promise from being fulfilled, so too, nothing can stop God’s promise to you.

Your partner in Hope

Debi

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The Christmas Miracle

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The birth of Jesus was told over 680 years before he was actually born. God told the prophet Isaiah that a saviour would be born to a virgin mother. That didn’t happen for hundreds of years after the promise was given.

Did God forget to do what he told Isaiah? No.

Did he change his mind? No.

Did he make a mistake? No

I often wonder weather Isaiah felt despondent about the fulfilment of that promise.

God told him something, he knew it was God talking to him. Yet he did not see it fulfilled in his lifetime.

Isaiah must have felt unhappy, sad, and questioned if he had actually heard from God. I imagined that he even doubted what God said, would happen.

His feelings didn’t stop or delay the promise because when God says a thing, he always bring it to pass regardless of the time. Because he’s working on his timeline not on ours.

Isaiah’s doubt did hinder God. Of course we were not told that he felt this way, this is my imagination. I believe as a human being, he may have felt some form of disappointment at not seeing the promise come to pass.

So let me encourage you as you continue to wait for what you’ve heard God said to you, your doubts, discouragement, tears and even your seemingly faithlessness will not stop God because His promises will always come to pass. He is not a man that he should lie.

Just hold on, for Just like the Christmas story came to pass and a miracle baby was born hundreds of years after he was promised, so will your promise child be born in your lifetime because God is faithful.

Isaiah was the prophet God used by to foretell of his coming son. Be encouraged, that which you have been promised will come to pass.

Your partner in hope

Debi

Christmas and waiting, Advent: Season of Hope,

Celebratory seasons, Advent: Walking in Our shoes, Ad, The Christmas Promise

Advent: Walking in Our shoes

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The story of Christmas is about Jesus coming as a baby. I have written about how the festivities surrounding this time of the year isn’t the reason he came.

One of the reasons he came was to step in to our world, to experience what it is like to be human.

The expression walking in someone’s else’s shoe is so apt here.

The Christ of Christmas came and lived amongst us, saw you in your world, your ache, your pain of waiting, witness the ache you felt from loss.

Saw you in the hospital gown as you wait for yet another egg extraction and another retriever, saw the pain of negative test etched on your face.

He came to your world and saw you and he knows the sadness loss, delays and disappointments brings, he knows how you feel right now. Because he experienced those same feelings too, while here on earth.

His life here on earth wasn’t palatable because even before he drew his first breath as a human, he was despised and rejected.

But Because he loves you and wants to show His love in the most insane way possible, he stepped into your world and walked where you are today.

As you continue in your own journey of trying, stop and think about this knowledge, he knows.

Be encouraged with this hope, comfort and assurance.

Because the reality is that he too left the comfort of His palace and came as a helpless baby. Galatians 3:4-5. 

Think about it.

For me he came. O a love so pure and true. That a king would come for me. O the wonder of it, I will never know.

Your partner in Hope

Debi

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Advent: Season of Hope

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2nd day of Advent.

If you celebrate christmas you will no doubt have began the process of shopping, planning, and Preparing for this wonderful time of the year.

I love this season of faith, joy, festivities just before the new year, a time when we as a people, all come together in one to make merry.

To remember and celebrate the birth of Jesus. Certainly for some, this time is now synonymous with parties and travel and time with families as they call it “the holidays”.

But truly, Advent is observed in many Christian denominations as a time of expectant waiting and preparation for the arrival of Jesus.

In silence contemplation, not in the busyness of high streets shopping malls.

The early church were told of his coming and prepared for it. Although not the same way we now prepare for Christmas, they waited quietly not in chaos.

They waited in hope of a saviour promised to rescue them from the tyranny of their oppressor.

They waited and expected deliverance and a new dawn.

So you see, the story of Christmas is one of waiting.

For those waiting for a baby, this conjures many emotions.

The last post Celebratory seasons talked about how this seasons maybe dreaded by those waiting for a child, as they observe little darlings in their cute Christmas outfits and plays.

I have walked your shoes, waited for 8 years, multiple miscarriages, multiple failed IVFs, so I can relate to the feeling of dread at this very time. As hope waned, expectations strains, you feel all alone.

But my message to you today is to expect something different, expect to receive literally your desires.

Expect to receive the promise of peace, the comfort that comes from waiting and expecting, expect to be touched by Jesus, who is our Prince of Peace.

And continue to hold on as The angel said to Mary

“Blessed is She who believes, for there will be a fulfillment of those things which where told her from the Lord”.

I urged you to wait in Hope for the expected promises.

Look out for tomorrows post “Perspectives”.

Your Partner in Hope

Debi

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Celebratory seasons, What’s In A Name., Good News of Great Joy, Advent: Day 7, His perfect plan.

Celebratory seasons

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Every year we celebrate all kinds of occasions, birthdays, anniversaries, graduations, halloween, thanksgiving and christmas.

These season can be triggers for the couple in waiting, because without fail, we see parents adore their young kids with outfit and proudly shows them off.

I did the same when my girls were still little. without thought for how my waiting friends feels. No one intentionally parades their kids to cause distress, we all do it from a place of joy.

But I understand the pain and agony these images can cause. The despair cause by your failed attempt to get pregnant, the repeated miscarriage and the loss of a child.

When I was waiting I discovered that more than seeing friends or pregnant women, the seasons of celebration is the hardest one to face.

There is no escaping the gaiety in the air as you watch friends, dress up with their babies, teens, sons or daughters in teamed outfit.

O the tug at your heart strings as you imagine how you will dress your baby. You build a picture and hold on to the hope that it will one day be you dressing up your child.

These image seems to diminish as the years go by.

And every year as you watch others with their tiny little babies dress up for school plays for halloween themed party for thanksgiving and Christmas dinner, you hide in floods of tears, loathing another celebratory season.

I am reminded by this passage in Psalm 143:8. Let the morning bring me word of your unfailing love.

Yes seasons may come and go and our desires tarries, but God’s word never changes.

Anchor your hopes to it and hold on, let each celebratory season remind you of His unfailing love and as we approach Christmas when you will have to face Santa and school plays, remember his birth is the reason we are here but his death and resurrection is a promise that we can hold on to his promise, that he will grant us our hearts desires.

For if he did not withhold his Son from us, he will give us freely our hearts desires.

Peace.

Your partner in hope.

Debi

Other related post:

A little town

Trust and Joy in mist of pain

To freeze or not.

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This is still the question asked by many women. weather or not to freeze their eggs.

As the awareness around infertility increases I believe there should be deliberate effort to make women aware of how fertility works. From an early age, women should be informed of the decline in their fertility so that they can start to plan for pregnancy, if they so chooses.

Knowing this, the best time to conceive is in the 20s and 30s. However, if this is not possible due to education, career opportunities, ill health, financial constraints, etc., egg freezing should be considered.

Egg reserved are finite, with this information women should should start to plan pregnancy before they turn 35, because according to scientific research, news eggs stop growing at that age. Fertility drops around age 37 and shaply at age 40. At 40 years of age, the chances of natural conception remain only five to 10 percent.

Women can decide they will freeze their eggs, get married early or delay pregnancy but still freeze their eggs. Having this knowledge empowers a woman in their choices

Since women’s fertility is finite, they don’t have the cells which will produce new eggs in the ovaries and the number of existing eggs is reserved. But, there are options to overcome this biological clock barrier.

Egg freezing is an option for women of childbearing age . Given the times we are living in now when more women are achieving their academic and financial potential, I think women should also achieve their dreams Of being a mum and one way to achieve this, is to freeze their eggs while young.

Women can conceive after menopause if they have chosen to freeze their eggs/embryos in their younger years.

I have seen too many friends who were not aware of this option now childless. Some have partners and would have gladly used A frozen egg. Others have no partners but would have settled for a child of their own using their own frozen eggs.

Another options is to use donor eggs, if you have not previously frozen your eggs

This will be done via IVF. The success of IVF also depends on the age and egg reserve of women. Doctors recommend the use of eggs when women are at their optimum age of reproduction and have plenty of egg reserve.

Platelets rich plasmas is injected into the ovaries

This is why egg freezing is important as it ensures that the best quality eggs are frozen and use when needed. Similarly a donor eggs are collected from younger healthy women and used by menopausal women.

If you are a young woman speak with your doctor regarding your options and what is involved in egg freezing process.

To be continued.

Your Partner in Hope

D’Ebi

The Egg Freezing process

It Only Takes One Egg

fertility Awareness

IVF:Stages to egg implantation

Tips to help treatment

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1. keeping a healthy weight. increases ones chances of pregnancy by any method.

According to the NHS, a weight under BMI of over 25 is ideal, they recommend that couples trying to get pregnant work toward achieve a healthy weight. It is thought that an obese woman may have hormonal issues which may impede pregnancy. Follow a healthy exercise and diet plan with your doctor will help you achieve the right weight for your height.

2. it is recommend that adults embark on 150 mins moderate to light mins exercise a week. Exercise activity which increases the heart rate helps to lower blood pressure, fight diabetes and increases a couples chances during IVF.

3. consume coffee in moderation. Some scientific research suggest that women undergoing IVF should consume no more than 3 cups of coffee daily. Too much caffeine can make it difficult to fall pregnant.

4. Start trying early: age plays a huge part in both natural conception and IVF pregnancy. the chances of a woman falling pregnant over 35 declines significantly. It is advise to seek treatment as soon as you start to try without success… The miracle of medicine means that more couples are become parents with the help of donor eggs and adopting. So don’t despair, you can still become a parent.

5. do not smoke, it is though that the quality of egg and sperm is affected by smoking. Before undergoing treatment speak with your doctor on how to quit.

6. Take measures to reduce your stress level. IVF is stressing enough, Being stressful will interfere with both the quality of egg and sperm. incorporate some mediation, yoga, pilates and acupuncture into your daily life to help reduce stress.

sources: NHS ENGLAND

Debbie

Your partner in Hope

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Extracts from Glamour: Amirah Vann her journey to motherhood

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Welcomed her baby girl, congratulations to her family.

I was so inspired by the article she wrote in Glamour I decided to share it here.

Many of us expect to recognize the “perfect time” to have a baby. The reality is that timing may never come. But in this life-altering year, how does one even consider bringing in a new life?

My fiancé Pat and I planned it, using ovulation test strips to know when would be the optimal time. But when it came down to taking the pregnancy test, I was uneasy. I told Pat, “I don’t think you left the stick in the urine long enough.” Then he showed me the result. 

But in that moment of unspeakable joy, I realized there is no perfect time, no foolproof season. In a year marked by fear, I remained grounded in the notion that our foremothers had children, intentionally or not, under far worse conditions than those we face today. It doesn’t matter whether you are 40 or 20—the world doesn’t adjust to your life; the career doesn’t stop for you. You have to decide this is what you want.

Read the rest here. Baby

No matter your situation and your story, there is always a possibility you are next in Line.

Parenthood is many thing but one thing is certain, there is always joy in the mist of pain. Ensure the pain and joy will flow in the end.

Your Partner in Hope

D’Ebi