Tag: faith

Blessings In Waiting

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Today we’re going to look at BLESSINGS IN WAITING.

I think trying or waiting for a child, child loss due to miscarriage or death is one of the most terrible experiences in anyones life.

I had two miscarriages, and sometimes I wonder what my unborn children would have looked like. Had they survived what ages will they be now. I have Come to terms with these loss, but I still wonder.

Anna is an example of a woman who yearned for a baby, she cried because she felt helpless at the delays, she saw her mates bearing children she saw how they relate with those children, she observed it all, day in and day out year in and out.

Elizabeth was also an example of one who waited. These blessings in waiting causes pain, we become entangled in the daily reality of the delay that we live in.

Everyone at one time or the other have experienced joy from having their prayers answered.

Have you ever waited for something, and got it?That desire was a blessing in waiting.

There was a time you waited for a job, for mortgage, for a life partner, for financial breakthrough. They were all blessings in waiting at one time or another.

When you look back, can you see that right now what you are waiting for may also come to pass, but in God’s own time and manner he chooses?

Let’s just pause and look back at those blessings in waiting which you now enjoy. I know how delays can lead us into a place of deep dissatisfaction inpatience and hopelessness.

I once had no children and spent days giving myself shots of IVF Injections, had 2 miscarriages from natural conceptions. But draw strength from those blessings in waiting that you now enjoy.

How do you explain that after eight years of waiting? Today, those blessings in waiting are my reality. I am living and enjoying my beautiful kids but I’m still waiting I’m waiting for a healing.

I was diagnosed with rheumatoid arthritis from an early age. It is under control now due to a course of several potent medications.

While enjoying my blessings of children, I draw strength from the fact that the God who did that for me can also fulfil his promise of healing in my life.

I want you to draw strength from your current blessings while you wait for those yet to come.

Look at that wait and compare all the benefits you are enjoying right now and encourage yourself, if he did it before he would do it again.

Your partner in Hope

Debi

Related links

Christmas Traditions, The age question. The Christmas Miracle, Advent: Walking in Our shoes, Advent: Season of Hope , Christmas and waiting, Celebratory seasons.

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Does God Forgets

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In our previous posts I wrote about Rachel and how God remembered her. often we make statements like ”God remembered me”.

But does God forget? That’s the question. Has he forgotten about you?

God is not human and does not forgets like humans beings does.

But often we use the word “God has remembered me”. Usage of that word suggests there is a flaw in God. A human flaw of forgetfulnesses.

Man is fallible so, man forgets.  But God is not a human that he should forget, right? Nor a  human that he should lie, has he said it and will he not do it?

Let me Put it to you that God does forgets. Yes he does. He forgets your sins. He himself said “I will remember their sins no more”. So here, God deliberately forgets and erase your sins from His memories. So when He looks at you He sees you clean.

Earlier on in my quest for a child I went through various scenarios, of times when I may have done somethings for which I was atoning for. It could be anything but the guilt of it all stacks up even more when I couldn’t fall pregnant.

I knew I was forgiven, I knew the delay was not a result of things I may have done.  I just couldn’t stop thinking there was something that is causing the delay. I wanted an answer and maybe you do too. It’s so easy to find a reason to hold on to. Hence we blame it on some past wrong doings.

We sometimes think that there is an underlining deep spiritual message that God was trying to send us?

Then I remember, it was I who forgot that God has forgotten about any past sins.

God did not keep the receipt, He clears the hard drive and every backup copy, He destroyed them. He does not remember my sins. He Forgot.

So I want to challenge you today to take whatever mistakes you think you have made, use an erase-able pan or a pencil Stack them up.

  • write what you remember one by one,
  • Put a strike next to them.
  • Scribble over them.
  • Then use the eraser and rob them out.
  • Finally rip the paper.

Do the same on your computer/Ipad or smart phone.

  • start typing out all the things you think you may have done wrong,
  • then press the back button or highlight them and
  • then delete it all without saving.
This is what God did.
He deleted, he erased, then ripped up the evidence. He doesn’t remember your sins because when you ask for his forgiveness he just erase it. He wiped the slate clean, he cannot remember and see you as new when he looks at you.

So the next time you think the delays you are experiencing is because of some past sins, some jealousy, habits or other horrible stuff, Just Remember, He doesn’t remember your sins.

You are forgiven, washed and cleaned and you have put on Christ As Paul said, so each time you pray he sees Christ. Not your sins.

He sees His son whom he sent as a baby a long time ago to come and cover you, to come and stand in your place on the cross.
Now you are dressed in righteousness and faultless to stand before His throne. That’s who you are, faultless. So come boldly thanking him, for his forgetfulness.
In his book God came near, Max Lucado wrote. Do yourself a favour purge your cellar . Exorcise your basement. Take the Roman  nails of Calvary and board up the door.

And remember he forgot.

Your Partner in Hope

Debi

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The Wonder Of Christmas, A Christmas Prayer, Advent: Season of Hope, Hope Against Hope, Our Hope For The New Year., The Christmas Promise,Moments of Splendors, The Possbilities of Christmas , Advent: Walking in Our shoes.

Too Good to be True

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You may have heard the term”too good to be true”. The statement means that if it’s too good to be true, it probably is.

I want to put another thought to you, in God’s world there is nothing like too Good to be true.

Because what seems too good to be true is actually true.

We see some too good to be true moments in the Christmas story.

Zachariah laughed when the angel told him he will be a father,

Sarah laughted when she was told she will become a mother.

An angel told Mary a virgin, she will pregnant with the savior .

These were too good to be true announcements causing some to wonder and laugh at the thought.

You may have been written off, in every sense of the word. Past the child bearing age and still unmarried with no child, yet you still hope.

Some of you may have wondered as well. “Me, become pregnant at 40, 45, 50! No, that’s absurd

Not after the medical diagnoses, after my miscarriage and several losses , after getting married late. After, after and more afters

If you believe and desire it. All things are possible to them who believe.

We saw in the previous post “unimaginable”, that We cannot out expect God, we cannot even contemplate what he has in store for us.

All we can do is trust that he has the best in store for us and in his own way, will bring it to pass. Just like he did in those “too good to be true stories above”.

So next time you question weather it will happen for you? Just know that if he did it in time past, he can do it again.

Trust and believe.

Your partner in Hope

Debi

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Unimagined, The Possbilities of Christmas , Moments of Splendors, Blessings In Waiting, The Christmas Miracle, Christmas and waiting, Christmas Traditions,The Christmas Promise.

Unimagined

D'EbiLeave a comment

This season is one of giving, retail outlets expects this to be a profitable season as shoppers look for that perfect gift for their families and friends.

I have seen some stunning gift wrapping techniques which puts to shame my limp attempt at wrapping . I am consoled by this saying “it’s the thought that counts, not the wrapping”.

This is so true, I have never seen anyone who decides not to unwrap their gift simply because the wrapping paper was too pretty. Without fail, adults and kids immediately tear into the wrapper hoping to find something of worth, something they imagined, or something unexpected.

Christ was an unexpected gift, although he was a promised king he was not a longed waited child. So His birth and everything surrounding it was unimagined.

Who would have imagined angels will appear to shepherds announcing his arrival?

Who would have imagined God will choose a teenage girl to use as a vessel via which a saviour will come.

Who would have imagined that Herod will be so cruel as to kill innocent children because he feared what that child will become?

Who would have imagined he would come, walk amongst men and perform so many miracle.

Who would have imagined this “King”, would die willingly and rise again?

Everything about his arrival, life, death and resurrection was unimaginable, which makes Christmas special.

As you wait for your own arrival one day. I am sure you have imagined the moment you find out you are expecting, you have imagined how your child will look, imagined their first steps, smile etc.

But God’s promise are unimaginable, even your best imagination has not yet imagined what God has in store for you..

How reassuring it is that we can’t out imagine God, His ways are past finding out.

As you wait and expect your burden of Joy, know that your eyes have not seen, your ears have not heard, neither your heart considered or imagined what God has in store for you.

it is unimaginable.

Your partner in Hope

Debi

Related post

Moments of Splendors, The Christmas Promise, Christmas Traditions, The Christmas Miracle, The Possbilities of Christmas Christmas and waiting: Blessings In Waiting

Moments of Splendors

D'EbiLeave a comment

What would you consider the most memorable time of your life?

Was it when you got married, got your degree, moved houses, got a new job? received a long expected news?

These are all great achievements to be celebrated but cannot be regarded as moments of splendor.

Moments of splendor was when an angel appeared to Mary and the wise men to tell of the birth of Jesus. They fell on their feet and worshiped. As the songs “the angel of the lord came down and glory shone around”.

I sometimes wondered what that moment was like for Mary and the shepherds: Some described their reaction as one of fear, but I think they were dazed, speechless and yes felt fearful, reverential fear.

This advent as you wait on your promise I pray that you will experience a moment of splendor in the revealing of whom Jesus His. May the power which came upon Mary Come on you and strengthened your body to conceive.

Enjoy this poem.

Moments of splendor, released by sparkling lights, Of angel piercing the skies, announcing the birth of our savior.

Moments of splendour it was as the angel said Fear not, good news is come Of a saviour born today In Bethlehem.

Such splendour thrills my heart. O the wonder of his birth, to see the glory of Christ our king.

Moments of splendour which brings hope. To know He came to be bruised, to be scorned, to be wounded.

That I might be made whole. In this my faith rest and my heart assured of His promise to me.

Your partner in Hope

Debi

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Advent: Walking in Our shoes

D'EbiLeave a comment

The story of Christmas is about Jesus coming as a baby. I have written about how the festivities surrounding this time of the year isn’t the reason he came.

One of the reasons he came was to step in to our world, to experience what it is like to be human.

The expression walking in someone’s else’s shoe is so apt here.

The Christ of Christmas came and lived amongst us, saw you in your world, your ache, your pain of waiting, witness the ache you felt from loss.

Saw you in the hospital gown as you wait for yet another egg extraction and another retriever, saw the pain of negative test etched on your face.

He came to your world and saw you and he knows the sadness loss, delays and disappointments brings, he knows how you feel right now. Because he experienced those same feelings too, while here on earth.

His life here on earth wasn’t palatable because even before he drew his first breath as a human, he was despised and rejected.

But Because he loves you and wants to show His love in the most insane way possible, he stepped into your world and walked where you are today.

As you continue in your own journey of trying, stop and think about this knowledge, he knows.

Be encouraged with this hope, comfort and assurance.

Because the reality is that he too left the comfort of His palace and came as a helpless baby. Galatians 3:4-5. 

Think about it.

For me he came. O a love so pure and true. That a king would come for me. O the wonder of it, I will never know.

Your partner in Hope

Debi

Related post.

The Possbilities of Christmas , Advent: Day 7, His perfect plan., Advent: Season of Hope, Christmas and waiting::Faith Vs Fear

Advent: Season of Hope

D'EbiLeave a comment

2nd day of Advent.

If you celebrate christmas you will no doubt have began the process of shopping, planning, and Preparing for this wonderful time of the year.

I love this season of faith, joy, festivities just before the new year, a time when we as a people, all come together in one to make merry.

To remember and celebrate the birth of Jesus. Certainly for some, this time is now synonymous with parties and travel and time with families as they call it “the holidays”.

But truly, Advent is observed in many Christian denominations as a time of expectant waiting and preparation for the arrival of Jesus.

In silence contemplation, not in the busyness of high streets shopping malls.

The early church were told of his coming and prepared for it. Although not the same way we now prepare for Christmas, they waited quietly not in chaos.

They waited in hope of a saviour promised to rescue them from the tyranny of their oppressor.

They waited and expected deliverance and a new dawn.

So you see, the story of Christmas is one of waiting.

For those waiting for a baby, this conjures many emotions.

The last post Celebratory seasons talked about how this seasons maybe dreaded by those waiting for a child, as they observe little darlings in their cute Christmas outfits and plays.

I have walked your shoes, waited for 8 years, multiple miscarriages, multiple failed IVFs, so I can relate to the feeling of dread at this very time. As hope waned, expectations strains, you feel all alone.

But my message to you today is to expect something different, expect to receive literally your desires.

Expect to receive the promise of peace, the comfort that comes from waiting and expecting, expect to be touched by Jesus, who is our Prince of Peace.

And continue to hold on as The angel said to Mary

“Blessed is She who believes, for there will be a fulfillment of those things which where told her from the Lord”.

I urged you to wait in Hope for the expected promises.

Look out for tomorrows post “Perspectives”.

Your Partner in Hope

Debi

RELATED POST

Celebratory seasons, What’s In A Name., Good News of Great Joy, Advent: Day 7, His perfect plan.

To freeze or not.

D'EbiLeave a comment

This is still the question asked by many women. weather or not to freeze their eggs.

As the awareness around infertility increases I believe there should be deliberate effort to make women aware of how fertility works. From an early age, women should be informed of the decline in their fertility so that they can start to plan for pregnancy, if they so chooses.

Knowing this, the best time to conceive is in the 20s and 30s. However, if this is not possible due to education, career opportunities, ill health, financial constraints, etc., egg freezing should be considered.

Egg reserved are finite, with this information women should should start to plan pregnancy before they turn 35, because according to scientific research, news eggs stop growing at that age. Fertility drops around age 37 and shaply at age 40. At 40 years of age, the chances of natural conception remain only five to 10 percent.

Women can decide they will freeze their eggs, get married early or delay pregnancy but still freeze their eggs. Having this knowledge empowers a woman in their choices

Since women’s fertility is finite, they don’t have the cells which will produce new eggs in the ovaries and the number of existing eggs is reserved. But, there are options to overcome this biological clock barrier.

Egg freezing is an option for women of childbearing age . Given the times we are living in now when more women are achieving their academic and financial potential, I think women should also achieve their dreams Of being a mum and one way to achieve this, is to freeze their eggs while young.

Women can conceive after menopause if they have chosen to freeze their eggs/embryos in their younger years.

I have seen too many friends who were not aware of this option now childless. Some have partners and would have gladly used A frozen egg. Others have no partners but would have settled for a child of their own using their own frozen eggs.

Another options is to use donor eggs, if you have not previously frozen your eggs

This will be done via IVF. The success of IVF also depends on the age and egg reserve of women. Doctors recommend the use of eggs when women are at their optimum age of reproduction and have plenty of egg reserve.

Platelets rich plasmas is injected into the ovaries

This is why egg freezing is important as it ensures that the best quality eggs are frozen and use when needed. Similarly a donor eggs are collected from younger healthy women and used by menopausal women.

If you are a young woman speak with your doctor regarding your options and what is involved in egg freezing process.

To be continued.

Your Partner in Hope

D’Ebi

The Egg Freezing process

It Only Takes One Egg

fertility Awareness

IVF:Stages to egg implantation

Extracts from Glamour: Amirah Vann her journey to motherhood

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Welcomed her baby girl, congratulations to her family.

I was so inspired by the article she wrote in Glamour I decided to share it here.

Many of us expect to recognize the “perfect time” to have a baby. The reality is that timing may never come. But in this life-altering year, how does one even consider bringing in a new life?

My fiancé Pat and I planned it, using ovulation test strips to know when would be the optimal time. But when it came down to taking the pregnancy test, I was uneasy. I told Pat, “I don’t think you left the stick in the urine long enough.” Then he showed me the result. 

But in that moment of unspeakable joy, I realized there is no perfect time, no foolproof season. In a year marked by fear, I remained grounded in the notion that our foremothers had children, intentionally or not, under far worse conditions than those we face today. It doesn’t matter whether you are 40 or 20—the world doesn’t adjust to your life; the career doesn’t stop for you. You have to decide this is what you want.

Read the rest here. Baby

No matter your situation and your story, there is always a possibility you are next in Line.

Parenthood is many thing but one thing is certain, there is always joy in the mist of pain. Ensure the pain and joy will flow in the end.

Your Partner in Hope

D’Ebi

How to Cope With the Stress of Infertility

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How to cope with the stress of infertility

One of the worse things a couple can learn is that they are unable to have children. This very discovery can either make or break a relationship.

Having spoken with so many couples about their experiences I have discovered that everyone is affected in a different way, but one common factor is stress.

This post brings you ways of coping with the stress brought on by infertility.

The feeling of helplessness and hopelessness is real to the infertile couple, this feeling if left unchecked can wreak more havoc.

The commonest forms of stress are depression, feelings of anxiety, and mental health problems.

Here are 5 ways you can adopt to deal with stress

1. Identify your feelings: Sometimes it is very difficult to know which feelings you are exhibiting so it is important to identify your feelings. It might hep to Talk to a professional to help you get in touch with your feelings. Identifying how you feel is the first step in dealing with other emotions like anger, guilt, fear, jealousy and shame.

2. Seek Help for your situations : there are a lot of resources on fertility options. (see sources below) rather than waste precious energy on negative emotions, busy yourself by seeking help. Find out all you need to know about your issues. Your doctor should be your first point of call as they will kick start the treatment process.

3. Consider the options available to you. Your research should include cost, the type of treatment available IVF, IUI, Intracytoplasmic sperm injection, other alternatives such as adoption, fostering, surrogacy should be considered also. Advancement in medicine has made possible the impossible.

4. Have a support net work. It is much easier to cope with a stressful situation by talking to someone than by coping alone. Your support net work can be a close friend, who will not be judgemental or a family member like a mum or sister. It can consist of a group or an individual. Be sure they they are people you can count on to be discreet and to always be supportive. There are lots of support groups on social media You can join but only share if you comfortable doing so.

5. Take on a hobby: Find something to do to take your mind off the situation. It can be a passion you had packed away, hiking, fund raising for a good cause, cooking or writing poetry etc. The very act of being engaged in something rewarding frees your mind from the stress of infertility.

Finally always look on the bright side. No matter how worse or bad a situation feels believe it can get better.

So I encourage you to hope for the best.

Believe the best

and expect the best to happen.

Your Partner in Hope

D’Ebi

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