Tag: help

GOT A BIG STONE PROBLEM?

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Back when my girls were still little, they often like picking up all sorts of strange things when we go out walking.

Like weeds which they call flowers, stones, which they call gold, papers, unusual items etc.

During one of those walks, we happened to come across a construction site, by the side of the road was a stone, they took turns trying to lift it, but couldn’t.‘mummy you try’, they chorused. I picked it up easily to their delight. mummy’s got powers they screamed.

It was a little stone to me but a big one to them.

This got me thinking, the problems we often face (infertility) seems immovable and enormous like stones we can’t shift or lift.

Mary Magdalene, Mary the mother of Jesus and Salome had a big stone problem. On the 3rd day of Jesus’s death, they brought spices to anoint his body, on their way to the tomb they wondered amongst themselves: ‘Who shall roll away the stone away, it was very great.

As they made their way to the tomb, I imagined, it suddenly dawned on them, that none of them can roll the stone away. They have to anoint his body, now a stone STOOD in their way. Perhaps they considered who amongst Jesus’s friends to call for help.

Peters? ‘No, he’s no good, have you seen the state of him since the master was killed?’ Guilt has eaten him up.

James?

John?

Andrew? And one by one they eliminated the disciples. I am sure they considered going back, they must have, they had no tools, no help, and a big stone.

Should we go back? Let’s just continue, “we have come too far to turn back now”.

The question remains “Who will roll away the stone”?

Maybe it was Mary the mother of Jesus who insisted on carrying on, maybe something Jesus told her kept her going? Maybe she just wanted to be near her dear son.

Imagine their reaction when they got to the tomb to find that their problem had gone, “the stone has been rolled away”. Surprised, shocked, worry, fear, all kinds of emotions must have coursed through them.

Who will roll away the stone?

Became, who rolled the stone away?

What happened to him? Has someone taken him?

Now imagine their joy when they learn he’s alive!!!, the stone was rolled away by his mighty power, and he’s alive. Wow, not only was the stone rolled away, their greatest problem was solved, “Jesus is alive”.

Often we get to the end of ourselves only to discover that He has taken care of it all, our deepest fear of being without a child, a husband, living with that illness, a job.

No matter how big your stone, trust in the master who knows your end from the beginning.

What seems like a might problem to you is nothing to him, he will not only roll your stone away, he will bring you out ALIVE, unscathed, safe and secured.

Keep going, pin your hopes on him, He’s got all power, He will roll away every stone like problem.

Dark clouds will roll away and your night will turn to day. Tears to Joy. Hold out and he will bring you through.

This Easter, have you got a stone like problem? Cling to the master who rolls always heavy stones.

Your Partner in Hope

Debi

RELATED READS

Celebratory seasons, A Glimpse of Hope

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Signs Of Infertility

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We have been writing about surrogacy and the reason to embark on a surrogate journey, on this page for a while:

This led me to think about signs of infertility. The more I speak with friends and those who have tried for a while the more  obvious it  becomes  that some couples delay in seeking help. 

So this post focuses on signs of infertility and when to seek help. 

See similar post herehttps://faithfulwait.com/2016/06/08/infertility-when-to-seek-help/

Infertility affects both male and female. In previous post we discussed that a third of infertility issues comes from women, the other third from men or combination of both, other factors related to unknown causes.

Below is a list of signs of infertility for women

  1. Painful sex
  2. Heavy; long or paid periods: could be a sign of endometriosis, this is a condition where tissues found in the womb are present elsewhere in the body.
  3. Irregular menstrual cycle.
  4. Hormone changes: a test by your doctor can detect changes in hormones: hormone change can lead to weight gain, facial hair in female, loss of sex drive, acne.
  5. Underlying medical conditions: such as damage to Fallopian tubes, PCOS, cancer. Rheumatoid Arthritis ( which is a condition I was diagnosed of).
  6. Obesity:

infertility in men:

 Signs of infertility in men can include 

  1. Hormone imbalance: The key hormone for male is Testosterone where problem with the testes can cause infertility. The males testes have two hormones  which make sperm, the luteinizing hormones and the stimulating hormones.  These hormones are produced by pituitary glands so any problems with this gland Amy also led to infertility in men.
  2. Erectile dysfunction: failure to have erection during sex can be as a result of stress or other psychological factors. Please seek medical intervention If this becomes a regular occurrence.
  3. Ejaculation problem: Any change or difficulty in ejeculation, can result in infertility, medical advice should be sought where this becomes a frequent occurrence 
  4. Problems with the testicle:  This may include swollen, painful, or tender testicles. If you noticed any of these or other changes in your testlces please seek help.
  5. Obesity: Obesity can affect both male and female fertility. It is important to keep your weight under check if you are trying for a baby. 

Other causes of infertility include 

  • Age
  • Excessive drinking/consumption of alcohol
  • Sexually transmitted disease
  • Smoking
  • Poor diet

When to seek help.

If you experience any of the above signs,  please consult your doctor if you are under 35 and have been trying for more than a year (6 months if you are over 35 of age).

Changes to make to boost your fertility 

Change of lifestyle may include having healthier meals

Exercise 

Decreases of total reduction of alcohol 

Keeping your weight in check.

Conclusion

It is important to observe your body for any signs of changes and consult your doctor as soo. As possible to avoid delays in getting pregnant

Your partner in Hope

References

D,Ebi

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Kick Start Your Fertility in 2020

D'Ebi1 Comment

It’s the beginning of the year and often we have goals and resolutions to adhere to.

Here at faithful wait we are guessing yours is to fall pregnant.

To bring you closer to your dream, we have complied a list of 10 activities or changes to embark on as you work on your desires.

1. Reduce your stress level: stress is now the most commonly diagnosed illness right now. It is especially stressful if you fail to fall pregnant after several tries. If this is you, do simple things to reduce your stress level. this can be planning 10 mins daily walk around the block or at lunch break, practice slow breathing techniques as part of a meditation exercise.

2. Keep a positive attitude, this will involve actively choosing to ignore the negatives. Fill your mind with thoughts that promotes good feeling. I find reading a daily motivation book or quote and meditating on this helps to feel my mind positive thoughts and actions.

3. Practice meditation. This will aid in stress reduction, practice calm breathing sessions, you can find helpful videos on YouTube and other health sites. If cost is no issue, join a gym where you can take part in Pilates and yoga classes.

4. Read. What’s your situation? What do you know about it? Research on it and find alternatives ways to achieve those goals. Exploring other option

5. Alternate medicine: take a daily supplement or vitamins. Folic acid is recommended for those trying to conceive. Discuss with your doctor on what the best medicine to take is.

6. Take up new hobbies. We are often so engaged in

Trying to get pregnant we forget to love life. Take up a new skill like gardening, sewing, knitting, drawing, or learning a language. This l will refocus your mind and take the focus off trying to conceive as well as shift the focus off the issue and release you to enjoying life while you wait.

7. Adopt a healthy lifestyle. This will involve healthy eating and daily exercise. Doctors recommend 30 minutes of moderate exercise. Take a brisk walk, daily swimming or running, whatever suits your you.

9. Hold no grudges. Yes life seems cruel, you may feel you’ve been dealt a bad hand. Let go and look on the bright side. It could be worse.

10. Seek help. To fall pregnant requires action. If you have tried unsuccessfully in the last year and still not pregnant. Find out why. Talk to your doctor. Explore the options available to you. The IVF PROCESS

Do something to get you started.!

These are just a few steps towards achieving your dream of becoming a parent. Find out more for yourself on this site.

Get started today and I wish you every success in 2020. Don’t call it quit

Partner in Hope

D’Ebi

The Egg Freezing process

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There are so many things couples faced with infertility have to consider, also single women and those undergoing chemotherapy also have to consider how to deal with their verity. 

Freezing one’s eggs is the best option to secure ones future as parents or to at least keep one’s hope of being a parent alive.

 

UK law allows you to store your eggs for up to 10 years.

In the UK, egg freezing costs on average between £3,500 and £4,500 for one cycle of treatment. In addition to this price, you’ll have to pay an annual fee to keep your eggs stored (from £200 to £360).

What is Egg Freezing?

Egg freezing is a method of preserving a woman’s fertility so she can try and have children at a later date.it involved collecting a woman’s egg, freezing them to allow her to have a baby later on when she’s ready. 

With marriage at an all time low and women finding the right partner much later it makes sense to freeze one’s eggs to ensure that when the time comes one can still have a baby. 

There are other medical reasons for freezing one’s eggs.

To embark on chemotherapy or If a woman  is due to undergo other medical treatment involving some potent drugs.

Also a woman’s chances of conceiving naturally falls as she gets older, becomes the egg quality decreases egg freezing ensures that the best quality eggs are frozen and preserved which can be thawed at a later date.

Key facts:

In 2017, 19% of IVF treatments using a patient’s own frozen eggs were successful.

It’s becoming more successful but by no means a guarantee of having a baby.

Funding may be available if you’re having treatment that affects your fertility. (Source hfea.co.uk)

Is egg freezing for you?

You might be wondering if egg freezing is for you. 

It may be, if you fall into any of the following.

  1. You currently have a medical condition or intend to undergo a treatment for a medical condition which can affect your fertility. 

  2. You are getting on in age and have not met the right partner to start a family with and worried about your quality of egg decking as you get older 

  3. Members of the armed forces who bring deployed to a war zone.

Process. 

Before egg freezing, you will be tested for HIV and Hepatitis, to ensure that affected samples are stored separately from unaffected samples. 

Once collected the eggs will  a crypto protectant which is a freezing solutions will be added to the eggs. The eggs will be frozen either by cooking them down slowly or by fast freezing called vitrification. 

The fast freezing is regarded as the best methods to adopt for preservation given its success rate. 

When you are ready to use your eggs, they will be thawed and fertilised with the sperm. 

THE COST 

The process of freezing eggs is expensive. On average the cost of having the eggs collected is about £3,350.

Egg storage cost between £125 and £350 per year. 

There maybe unexpected cost added in by the clinic, so It is important to get a full cost of the treatment plan.

Thawing eggs and transferring them to the womb costs an average of £2,500. So, the whole process for egg freezing and thawing costs an average of £7,000-£8,000.

Egg freezing is becoming more popular as more people are freezing their eggs.

In 2017, there were 1,463 egg freezing cycles (in comparison to almost 70,000 IVF treatment cycles overall). Between 2010 and 2017, around 700 babies were born through frozen eggs in the UK.

If you do decided to freeze your eggs be sure to carry out some background checks on the clinic before embarking on the process. Be sure to check out the success rate for women in your age bracket.

Summary.

Eggs can only be kept for 10 years unless exceptional medical circumstances, where you can be allowed to store the eggs up to 55 years. 

To use frozen eggs for fertility process it has to be thawed, the eggs are fertilised via a fertility treatment proves known as ICSI. 

This is because the freezing process makes the outer coating around the egg tougher making fertilisation via turn normal IVF process harder. 

You must update your records at the clinic they do change. This is so that you can be contacted before the 10 years limit for destroying the eggs. 

Your Partner In Hope 

D’Ebi

Related links

https://faithfulwait.com/2019/09/27/ivf-process-step-by-step/

https://faithfulwait.com/2018/08/13/single-women-and-ivf/

https://faithfulwait.com/2018/04/15/exploring-other-options-icsi/

Sources

NHS

HFEA

Exploring Other Options: ICSI

D'EbiLeave a comment

I have previously written on exploring other options when it comes to seeking fertility treatment. This POST will examine one of those options the ICSI.

According to the HFEA.

the cause of infertility in around half of couples having problems conceiving is sperm-related. ICSI offers hope to these couples most common and successful treatment for male infertility.

ICSE means – (Intracytoplasmic Sperm Injection )ICSI is a specialised form of In Vitro Fertilisation (IVF) it is used for the treatment of severe cases of male-factor infertility.

It is intended for couples with the following problems.

very low sperm count

abnormally shaped sperm (poor morphology) or where the sperm move abnormally (poor motility)

previous IVF TREATMENT.

A situation Where the sperm needs to be collected surgically from the testicles or epididymis (a narrow tube inside the scrotum where sperm are stored and matured); possibly because of vasectomy,

The process involves the injection of a single sperm directly into a mature egg.

Just like IVF the process involves stimulating the ovaries to produce a mature egg. Once the eggs are matured they are retrieved and fertilised with the sperm.

When the egg is fertilised it is left in the lab for a few days.

The embryo is transfer

embryo transfer can be two in some cases the number of embryo transferred depends on the woman’s age, once transferred it is recommended that the woman reduce their movement for the next 24 hours. the remaining good-quality embryos will be frozen and stored to be used in future cycle if necessary.

After the transfer, then begin the wait, before the all-important pregnancy test.

Availability:

according to the NHS website couples undergoing IVF treatment can use ICSI as a method of insemination if required.

The University Hospitals Coventry and Warwickshire NHS Trust was one of the first in the country to be licensed to offer the treatment.

How is ICSI different from IVF?

The steps are similar at the early stages however with IVF the eggs are placed together with the sperm fertilization occurs when the sperm swims to the egg.

In ICSI there is a bit more interference by the embryologist. Here the sperm is selected and injected directly into the egg.This maximises the chance of fertilisation taking place as it bypasses any potential problems the sperm will have in actually getting to the egg.

the success rate?

generally the success rate for both IVF and ICSI are similar. According to the HFEA fertilisation happens in around 90% of cases.

Fertilisation doesn’t necessarily means a successful pregnancy.

One of the deterring factor for success is a woman’s age and any previous difficulty.in conceiving. After transfer there is a 2 weeks wait at before pregnancy can be confirmed by a blood test.

I hope you found this useful. For more in depth information please visit the Following website

NHS UK

HFEA

And your family Doctor

Your Partner in Hope

D’Ebi

Endometriosis: A Cause of infertility

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I have previously written about causes of infertility see post here.

In this post I want to explore endometriosis in more detail.i was moved to write about this after reading the story of Lene Dunham, the American actress who spoke about her decision to have a hysterectomy due to endometriosis.

Endometriosis occurs when the tissue that lines the uterus (endometrium) is outside of the uterus instead of inside and in other parts of the body.

It can be in the ovaries, fallopian tubes, inside the tummy, and in or around the bladder or bowel.

According to the endometriosis foundation of American

It is a disease of the female reproductive system.

It affects women of childbearing age.

1 in 10 women have the disease.

It is Not easily diagnosed.

It is one of the leading causes of infertility.

Symptoms includes

Pain in the lower tummy or back (pelvic pain) – usually worse during your period.

Period pain that prevents carrying out day to day activities.

Pain during or after sex.

Pain when peeing or pooping during your period

feeling sick, constipation, diarrhoea, or blood in pee during the period

Difficulty getting pregnant

It can also led to depression as it becomes a big part of a woman’s life.

Diagnosis

If you are experiencing any of the above symptoms, see your Doctor. It might help to keep a diary of your symptoms (see link to a PDF diary below) as at when you get them, this helps to give the doctor a good description of the issue. This is because it is often difficult to diagnose as the symptoms are similar to other illness.

Your doctor should carry out some test or refer you to specialist (gynaecologist) who may carry out a laparoscopy.

Laparoscopy is where a surgeon passes a thin tube through a small cut in your skin so they can see any patches of endometriosis tissue. This is the only way to determine if the endometrial tissue is present.

Treatment and ways to alleviate pains.

The NHS and journal of endometriosis do recommend the following as treatment options:

Dietary changes: to include food with inflammatory properties can also help.

Cutting out caffeine and alcohol.

Take painkillers – such as ibuprofen and paracetamol.

Hormone medicines and contraceptives – including the combined pill, the contraceptive patch, an intrauterine system (IUS), and medicines called gonadotrophin-releasing hormone (GnRH) analogues. According to the journal many women reports relief after taking the birth control pills.

Surgery to cut away patches of endometriosis tissue.

An operation to remove part or all of the organs affected by endometriosis – such as surgery to remove the womb (hysterectomy)

Having an hysterectomy is seen as an option but medical experts suggests that this should be the last option and only after seeking the advice of medical advice.

Some women take out their womb as well as the ovaries as the ovaries increases the severity of the pains due to the release of estrogen as egg is being released.

However some women do take out their womb and leave their ovaries in the hope of using their own eggs to have their own biological children.

Endometriosis is one of the leading causes of infertility in women. Surgery to remove endometriosis tissue can help improve your chances of getting pregnant, although there’s no guarantee that you’ll be able to get pregnant after treatment.

Surgery for endometriosis can also sometimes cause further problems, such as infections, bleeding, or damage to affected organs. If surgery is recommended for you, talk to your surgeon about the possible risks.

Lena Dunham recently had an hysterectomy but left her ovaries. She has decided to openly talk about her experiences with the disease

Fertility expert recommends freezing one’s eggs to ensure that they remain healthy and not destroyed by endometriosis.

CAUSE OF ENDOMETRIOSIS

According to Endometriosis UK. Cause is still unknown and possible causes range from

Genetics – if the conditions runs in the families, and in certain ethnic group. You may be more likely affected by it.

Retrograde menstruation – when some of the womb lining flows up through the fallopian tubes and embeds itself on the organs of the pelvis, rather than leaving the body as a period.

Problem with the immune system (the body’s natural defence against illness and infection).

Endometrium cells spreading through the body in the bloodstream or lymphatic system (a series of tubes and glands that form part of the immune system).

But none of these theories fully explain why endometriosis occurs. It’s likely the condition is caused by a combination of different factors.-

(NHS UK).

Coping with Endometriosis:

Many women become aware of the disease after unsuccessful attempts to get pregnant.

So talk to your gynaecologist about your symptoms, and join support groups like, endometriosis UK which has a directory of local support groups.

Your partner in Hope

D’Ebi

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Avoid Depression 

D'Ebi1 Comment

free PrintablesA wait that is hopeful is a wait that looks forward expectantly, purposely and joyously.

A wait which strengthens and prepares your heart for what you expect. What use is there in being miserable on the journey? Easy to say unh? Unfortunately misery often accompanied me while I waited for my little bean.

I thought I was strong, always the positive one until I couldn’t get pregnant. I kept it together for a while until the questions started coming. Questions from well meaning friends and foes. The scale finally tilted and I almost caved in to depression.

A subtle, creepy creature sneaks in, often  from a reaction to  an angry outburst, or insensitive slur it comes unannounced taking hold of its prey.

I felt I was losing control of my emotions and started feeling helpless. I sought help and found out that  the following can be a sign of depression:shake it off

Helplessness: research have shown that whenever we are depressed, we usually experience a feeling of helplessness. Our feelings are brought about by our thoughts which produces fruits. Good fruits or bad fruits.

If you constantly think thoughts like “why us/me”? “everyone is having a baby but me”, “will I ever have kids”?, “I give up”. This will be followed by a feeling of helplessness, which in turn leads to misery characterised by constant tears. 

Deep sadness: as he thinks, so he is. Infertility is a cause of misery which leads to deep sadness. An indescribable feeling which also leads to feelings of helplessness.

If you constantly dwell on the negative, joy and peace will elude you. How can you expect to feel great when your heart is heavy from pain. 

Feelings of rejection: as our thoughts leads to deep sadness in time we may begin to feel rejected. This feeling is a worse state of being because we may fall into the trap of interpreting the actions of everyone based on our issues.

I decided to do something about my mental state to avoid going over the edge.

  1.  Talk about my feelings: I started opening up about my feeling and soon found release. You can go for counselling if you do not want to feel vulnerable in front of friends. Your local clinic or health centre may be able to recommend a good counselling clinic. There might be sessions for those struggling to conceive, with programs designed to help deal with  depression.
  2. I decided to be joyful on  purpose: Your mind is the control room of your whole body. It sends signal to your brain, heart and body. Feed it with good and positive things and out of it will come joy. 

  3. Find inspiration around you: be inspired when you hear a good news story, either on the news or from a magazine or a kind act. Train mind to focus on the good concerning your situation. Controlling your thought is the first step in achieving freedom from depression. img_2580

  4. Be anchored to hope: hope is what keeps you going, believing and trying. Hopes is the tread which keeps you tied to the dream. If you don’t keep your hopes up, they will go down and soon you will drift away from your dreams, faith and beliefs. Be a prisoner to hope, build a strong resolved to try and trust again. Be convinced about something good coming your way.

  5. Pray: prayer really helped me let go of the hurt, pain and disappointment I felt from not falling pregnant. In praying we can release the heavy burden, sadness, helplessness and depression to God. In prayer, we become free.

I am not denying the fact that there will be days when tears is all you’ve got, when the pain of trying weighs you down. The pain is real and present. However, deciding to enjoy life and live free from depression may be the push you need to get  through it. 

Remember: the clouds will come, then it gives way to the sun. Every downpour will cease, trouble and pain will be followed by gain, we may understand some and  others we may not.

So whatever season you are in right now,  remember, after a while this too shall pass.

Your Friend and Partner in Hope

 

D’Ebi

 

Infertility: When to seek help

D'Ebi1 Comment

Following on from my post, causes of infertility in women  in women, I want to examine the treatment options available;

LIFE (1)According to the Human fertilization and embryology Authority, 80% of couples who have regular sexual intercourse (that is, every two to three days) and who do not use contraception will get pregnant within a year.

The majority of the remaining 20% achieve a pregnancy within two years of trying.

An estimated one in seven couples has difficulty conceiving. There are several possible reasons for not getting pregnant naturally.

In men, Infertility is usually due to low numbers or poor quality of sperm.

Women become less fertile as they get older. For women aged 35, about 95% who have regular unprotected sexual intercourse will get pregnant after three years of trying. For women aged 38, only 75 % will do so. The effect of age upon men’s fertility is less clear.

Sometimes infertility problems can be due to a combination of factors. It is reported that in a third of cases, a clear cause is never established.what to do when you feel stuck

Where can I get help?

If you have not been able to get pregnant after two years of regular, unprotected sexual intercourse, either one or both of you may have a fertility problem.

However, you don’t need to wait that long to seek help, see your family Doctor as soon as possible, if you are concerned about the length of time.

At the initial stage:  …Your doctor will take a medical history, give you a physical examination and may recommend some tests or a few change in lifestyle.

You will be offered a test, if you have been trying to get pregnant for over a year, to check that you are ovulating and your partner should be offered tests to check his sperm.

Further test will be offered (see below) if nothing is found after carrying out the above test:

Initial test includes: for Women

  • Cervical smear test if you haven’t had one recently.
  • Urine test for chlamydia, which can block your fallopian tubes, preventing you from becoming pregnant.
  • Blood test to see if you are ovulating. This is done by measuring progesterone in a blood sample taken seven days before your period is due.
  • Blood test to check for German measles (Rubella) which, if contracted during the first three months of pregnancy, can harm your unborn baby.
  • Blood test during your period to check for hormone imbalances –measurement of FSH (follicle stimulating hormone, LH (luteinising hormone) and oestradiol. This test can also identify possible early menopause as a cause of subfertility.

Tests for men

  • Sperm test to check for abnormalities.
  • Urine test for chlamydia, which, in addition to being a known cause of infertility in women, can also affect sperm function and male fertility.

 what happens next?

  • If your test results are normal and you have been trying for a baby for less than 18 months, your family doctor may suggest you make a few lifestyle changes and continue trying to conceive naturally.
  • If the tests reveal a possible fertility issue, your doctor will refer you to a fertility specialist, who will carry out further tests and possible treatment at your local hospital or fertility unit.

Getting help and getting it quick is very important especially if you are over 30. Although statistics shows that more people over 35 are having kids, it is important to seek help early in order to get the help you need if necessary.

my prayer and hope for you is that you will find help and in so doing, come to know the joy of having a child of your own.

Your partner in hope:

Debbie

 

Other Related article:

causes of infertility in women

sources

Human fertilisation and embryology authority, NHS