Tag: IVF

The Wonder Of Christmas

D'EbiLeave a comment

What is it, that causes you to shudder? What miracle have you seen or heard about that makes you wonder whether it was true or made up?

Wonder is defined as something which fills you with amazement or awe.

The 7 wonders of the ancient world, comes to my mind when I think of wonder. The creators or designers of those human edifice were considered to be genius at a time of no technological advancement as we see today, they came up with Great pyramids, the hanging gardens, the coliseum and many more.

As awe inspiring as these are, they stand pale in comparison to the Christmas story.

Human beings in their brilliance are yet to make a virgin pregnant or raise anyone from the dead.

That’s the wonder of Christmas, This is the reason we celebrate because of the uniqueness of this story. It is so special that it is still the subject of dispute.

If God can come into our world in the manner in which He did, isn’t He able to come into your own situation and turn things around? Yes, He can and He will.

I dare you to keep trusting, believing and His wonder will be performed in your life.

The wonder of it all.

The wonder of it all, that the pitter patter feet of little feet, would become the thundering steps in hell.

Oh the wonder if it, that the little baby of Bethlehem will become the healer and performer of miracles.

The wonder of it all, that the man who hung on the cross is the saviour who died for me.

The wonder of it all that he now sits on the throne as a king interceding for me.

O the wonder if it all.

Your Partner in Hope

Debi

Related post

The Possbilities of Christmas , Too Good to be True, The Christmas Promise, A Christmas Prayer, Advent: Walking in Our shoes, Moments of Splendors, Unimagined,Blessings In Waiting.

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Too Good to be True

D'EbiLeave a comment

You may have heard the term”too good to be true”. The statement means that if it’s too good to be true, it probably is.

I want to put another thought to you, in God’s world there is nothing like too Good to be true.

Because what seems too good to be true is actually true.

We see some too good to be true moments in the Christmas story.

Zachariah laughed when the angel told him he will be a father,

Sarah laughted when she was told she will become a mother.

An angel told Mary a virgin, she will pregnant with the savior .

These were too good to be true announcements causing some to wonder and laugh at the thought.

You may have been written off, in every sense of the word. Past the child bearing age and still unmarried with no child, yet you still hope.

Some of you may have wondered as well. “Me, become pregnant at 40, 45, 50! No, that’s absurd

Not after the medical diagnoses, after my miscarriage and several losses , after getting married late. After, after and more afters

If you believe and desire it. All things are possible to them who believe.

We saw in the previous post “unimaginable”, that We cannot out expect God, we cannot even contemplate what he has in store for us.

All we can do is trust that he has the best in store for us and in his own way, will bring it to pass. Just like he did in those “too good to be true stories above”.

So next time you question weather it will happen for you? Just know that if he did it in time past, he can do it again.

Trust and believe.

Your partner in Hope

Debi

Related pieces

Unimagined, The Possbilities of Christmas , Moments of Splendors, Blessings In Waiting, The Christmas Miracle, Christmas and waiting, Christmas Traditions,The Christmas Promise.

Advent: Walking in Our shoes

D'EbiLeave a comment

The story of Christmas is about Jesus coming as a baby. I have written about how the festivities surrounding this time of the year isn’t the reason he came.

One of the reasons he came was to step in to our world, to experience what it is like to be human.

The expression walking in someone’s else’s shoe is so apt here.

The Christ of Christmas came and lived amongst us, saw you in your world, your ache, your pain of waiting, witness the ache you felt from loss.

Saw you in the hospital gown as you wait for yet another egg extraction and another retriever, saw the pain of negative test etched on your face.

He came to your world and saw you and he knows the sadness loss, delays and disappointments brings, he knows how you feel right now. Because he experienced those same feelings too, while here on earth.

His life here on earth wasn’t palatable because even before he drew his first breath as a human, he was despised and rejected.

But Because he loves you and wants to show His love in the most insane way possible, he stepped into your world and walked where you are today.

As you continue in your own journey of trying, stop and think about this knowledge, he knows.

Be encouraged with this hope, comfort and assurance.

Because the reality is that he too left the comfort of His palace and came as a helpless baby. Galatians 3:4-5. 

Think about it.

For me he came. O a love so pure and true. That a king would come for me. O the wonder of it, I will never know.

Your partner in Hope

Debi

Related post.

The Possbilities of Christmas , Advent: Day 7, His perfect plan., Advent: Season of Hope, Christmas and waiting::Faith Vs Fear

To freeze or not.

D'EbiLeave a comment

This is still the question asked by many women. weather or not to freeze their eggs.

As the awareness around infertility increases I believe there should be deliberate effort to make women aware of how fertility works. From an early age, women should be informed of the decline in their fertility so that they can start to plan for pregnancy, if they so chooses.

Knowing this, the best time to conceive is in the 20s and 30s. However, if this is not possible due to education, career opportunities, ill health, financial constraints, etc., egg freezing should be considered.

Egg reserved are finite, with this information women should should start to plan pregnancy before they turn 35, because according to scientific research, news eggs stop growing at that age. Fertility drops around age 37 and shaply at age 40. At 40 years of age, the chances of natural conception remain only five to 10 percent.

Women can decide they will freeze their eggs, get married early or delay pregnancy but still freeze their eggs. Having this knowledge empowers a woman in their choices

Since women’s fertility is finite, they don’t have the cells which will produce new eggs in the ovaries and the number of existing eggs is reserved. But, there are options to overcome this biological clock barrier.

Egg freezing is an option for women of childbearing age . Given the times we are living in now when more women are achieving their academic and financial potential, I think women should also achieve their dreams Of being a mum and one way to achieve this, is to freeze their eggs while young.

Women can conceive after menopause if they have chosen to freeze their eggs/embryos in their younger years.

I have seen too many friends who were not aware of this option now childless. Some have partners and would have gladly used A frozen egg. Others have no partners but would have settled for a child of their own using their own frozen eggs.

Another options is to use donor eggs, if you have not previously frozen your eggs

This will be done via IVF. The success of IVF also depends on the age and egg reserve of women. Doctors recommend the use of eggs when women are at their optimum age of reproduction and have plenty of egg reserve.

Platelets rich plasmas is injected into the ovaries

This is why egg freezing is important as it ensures that the best quality eggs are frozen and use when needed. Similarly a donor eggs are collected from younger healthy women and used by menopausal women.

If you are a young woman speak with your doctor regarding your options and what is involved in egg freezing process.

To be continued.

Your Partner in Hope

D’Ebi

The Egg Freezing process

It Only Takes One Egg

fertility Awareness

IVF:Stages to egg implantation

To add or not to add

D'EbiLeave a comment

According to a recent report by an Australia IVF specialist, standard IVF works therefore there is no need for expensive adds on.

for instance 

ICSI which stands for Intracycloplastic was developed in 1992 as a way of treating male infertility. However, a growing number of clinics are now using it for men with normal sperm count. 

A recent article in the medical journal the lancet based on data from Vietnam, reports that ICSI although much expensive, does not improve the chances of success. 

Their hunch is that “doctors may recommend it for fear of patients’ reactions if the eggs don’t fertilise, even if ICSI doesn’t improve the ultimate chance of a baby for those with a normal sperm count.”

Couples with infertility belong to a very vulnerable group who will do almost anything to achieve a pregnancy. They deserve our dedicated care and evidence-based treatment.” The report concluded. 

So before accepting all that’s recommended by your clinic, 

  • review your results.
  • Ask specific and detailed questions.
  • Undertake your own research into your own Diagnosis, 
  • Review the data  available and read the latest in medical intervention and their successes. 
  • Make your own mind up and resist pressure from your clinic. 

I know it’s difficult to argue with the doctors and the presumption is that they know what they are doing. But when it’s your body and issue, you can certainly ask questions and be satisfied that what you are paying for is absolutely necessary. And lastly, be positive and know that whatever is in store for you will be nice. 

Your Partner in Hope

Debi

Fertility Awareness

D'EbiLeave a comment

It was national fertility awareness week recently and I want to highlight some stats about.

In some countries like Canada, more people are living with infertility than diagnose with lung cancer which is the leading cause of death in Canada.

According to Dr Gaberielle Cassir, who appeared on the Global News in Montreal. Up to 15 % of couples are infertile and the numbers are rising.

There are various causes of infertility: which ranges from the rising age of women having babies as more women are putting off having children later, to unexplained infertility.

There is no perfect answer the specific causes are evenly divided

in 35% of cases, the causes of infertility is due to problems with the pelvic or fallopian tube abnormality.

10% of cases relates to unexplained causes which is usually hard to deal with.

35% male factor

15% ovulatory disfunction.

It is important to create awareness on the causes of infertility to make sure that couples seek help quickly and avoid unnecessary delays which might lead to more problems later.

Currently the world is also dealing with covid and there are various theories on its impact on fertility.

Again, it is generally agreed in the medical world that this is fueled by myth being propagated on social medial.

While is it normal to question the impact of a new vaccine on ones fertility, it is also important to look at the data.

If you are worried speak with your doctor and find out all you need to know about the vaccine.

Is it necessary to talk about fertility issues with the young generation?

I think it is : this is because the first time most couples become aware of the issues surrounding fertility is when they start to try to have a baby, I think talking about it earlier in a young person’s life may be the difference between delays in seeking help and waiting for miracles to happen.

The emotions we feel are common emotions and are distressing and these can cause a huge physiological toil.

Society can prepare youth for the chances of infertility and open an avenue to speak about it.

No one wants to spread fear to our young people, but at the same time it is important to create an awareness. Parents can have that conversation with their kids same as talking about changes in the body during puberty years and teen years, although a bit later.

The emotions are intense and can cause a huge toil on one’s health, no one can be prepared enough, but at least the being in the know can make a huge difference on how one handles the challenges pose by infertility.

We need to demystify the fear and taboo around taking about having fertility issue.

There should be no guilt, shame, taboo surrounding the topic of infertility.

There should be a conversation and women should feel they have a safe place to talk. I am glad that women like Chrissy Teigen, Hilaria Baldwin, Amy Schumer are open about their struggles with infertity and I think this has done more to increase the awareness around miscarriage and IVF. Women are beginning to see that they are not alone and there is some conform in knowing that others have felt the way you do.

Be encouraged and seek help earlier.

Wishing you every success on your fertility journey.

Your Partner in Hope

Debbie

Read More »

Fertility Journey

D'EbiLeave a comment

Do you know what you are getting into I asked? “No, came the reply”, I don’t and I don’t care.

The only thing I care about is that a baby comes out at the end of it all. This was the conversation I had with a colleague a few weeks ago.

2 months into her treatment, she was exhausted, miserable and, an emotional wreck. She was broken in more ways than she ever thought possible.

She has had 3 failed cycle and became pregnant on the 4 try.

Little did she she know what she was getting into. If only someone had told me, she recalled months after giving birth:

So, how can you prepare for Treatment? How do you ensure that you are some how ready and have some insight into what you are about to embark on.

First you need to understand the stages of fertility treatments and what is involved.

According to the NHS websites there are 3 types of fertility treatments. 

Today’s post will focus on Medicines. 

  1. medicines
  2. surgical procedures
  3. assisted conception – including intrauterine insemination (IUI) and in vitro fertilisation (IVF)

Medicines

Common fertility medicines include:

clomifene – This is a drug given to stimulate ovulation. It encourages the monthly release of an egg (ovulation) in women who do not ovulate regularly or cannot ovulate at all. 

tamoxifen: This is an alternative to clomiphene that is also an ovulation stimulating drug offered to those with ovulation problems. 

metformin – is particularly beneficial for women who have polycystic ovary syndrome (PCOS).

Other ovarian stimulating drugs are 

gonadotrophins – can help stimulate ovulation in women, and may also improve fertility in men

gonadotrophin-releasing hormone and dopamine agonists – other types of medicine prescribed to encourage ovulation in women

These drugs are prescribed if your doctor thinks you need them.

Some of these medicines may cause side effects, such as nausea, vomiting, headaches and hot flushes.

So it is important to speak to your doctor for more information about the possible side effects of specific medicines.

Watch out for next post where we continue on Surgical procedures

Your partner in Hope

D’Ebi

Sources

stages of treatment @nhs.uk

related post

IVF PROCESS: Step by Step

Add ins to fertility treatment

IVF:Stages to egg implantation

How to Cope With the Stress of Infertility

D'EbiLeave a comment

How to cope with the stress of infertility

One of the worse things a couple can learn is that they are unable to have children. This very discovery can either make or break a relationship.

Having spoken with so many couples about their experiences I have discovered that everyone is affected in a different way, but one common factor is stress.

This post brings you ways of coping with the stress brought on by infertility.

The feeling of helplessness and hopelessness is real to the infertile couple, this feeling if left unchecked can wreak more havoc.

The commonest forms of stress are depression, feelings of anxiety, and mental health problems.

Here are 5 ways you can adopt to deal with stress

1. Identify your feelings: Sometimes it is very difficult to know which feelings you are exhibiting so it is important to identify your feelings. It might hep to Talk to a professional to help you get in touch with your feelings. Identifying how you feel is the first step in dealing with other emotions like anger, guilt, fear, jealousy and shame.

2. Seek Help for your situations : there are a lot of resources on fertility options. (see sources below) rather than waste precious energy on negative emotions, busy yourself by seeking help. Find out all you need to know about your issues. Your doctor should be your first point of call as they will kick start the treatment process.

3. Consider the options available to you. Your research should include cost, the type of treatment available IVF, IUI, Intracytoplasmic sperm injection, other alternatives such as adoption, fostering, surrogacy should be considered also. Advancement in medicine has made possible the impossible.

4. Have a support net work. It is much easier to cope with a stressful situation by talking to someone than by coping alone. Your support net work can be a close friend, who will not be judgemental or a family member like a mum or sister. It can consist of a group or an individual. Be sure they they are people you can count on to be discreet and to always be supportive. There are lots of support groups on social media You can join but only share if you comfortable doing so.

5. Take on a hobby: Find something to do to take your mind off the situation. It can be a passion you had packed away, hiking, fund raising for a good cause, cooking or writing poetry etc. The very act of being engaged in something rewarding frees your mind from the stress of infertility.

Finally always look on the bright side. No matter how worse or bad a situation feels believe it can get better.

So I encourage you to hope for the best.

Believe the best

and expect the best to happen.

Your Partner in Hope

D’Ebi

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The 2 weeks wait

D'EbiLeave a comment

Those who got pregnant naturally may not have heard of the two weeks wait.

I certainly was not anxiously waiting two weeks after falling pregnant with our second child to see if there was a positive test or not. It was 12 weeks after, I noticed I was late.

For those who have embarked on IVFs, the period immediately after egg transfer can be the most stress-filled days, it certainly was for me.

I was plague with questions like, what if this fails?

Endless questions like, why don’t i feel anything?

Every twinged was analyzed.

Every symptoms is interpreted as meaning something… a loss, especially having suffered miscarriage

So how do you survive this wait, how do you wait while you wait?

This post gives tips on what to do while waiting:

Do not obsess over every twinge, feelings and changes you notice.

You will feel differently from day to day, so save yourself the stress of ringing up your doctor whenever you think something is wrong.

I know this is a difficult task, but doing the next few steps will help.

  1. Take up an interest, this may seem like the most unlikely time to start something new, but doing something new can has focus your mind and in the process reduce the anxiety of having to constantly fixate on what is happening during the wait. There are lots of sites offering short courses on a varied range of interests .
  2. Walks: This is not the time to go for intensive exercise classes, but you can go for short walks in the woods and admire nature’s beauty.
  3. Yoga: IVF takes so much out of you and yoga is a great way to center your senses.It is great for relaxing and also focuses your mind on being calm as you concentrate on your breathing. Yoga relaxes you into calmness which lingers afterwards.
  4. I took up reflexology during my wait and often come away feeling relaxed. There are great work out videos on youtube.
  5. Learn how to cook a new dish. The process of researching, selecting, preparing the ingredients, peeling, cutting, cleaning the ingredients, engages the mind and also fills you with a sense of achievement. The very motion of cooking engages a different part of the brain. Invite friends over and share the meals with them. laughter and banter with others will do you a world of good.
  6. plan a date with your partner: Fingers crossed everything will go well and this maybe the last few weeks of being alone before your little baby comes. So enjoy the moment and do little stuff together.
  7. Start your diary and begin to write about your IVF experiences, you never know who this may help in future. I kept a dairy of my fertility journey which has formed the basis of this blog.
  8. Get going on that to do list you have been meaning to get to, be careful not to do any heavy lifting. Dusting and tidying of drawers and wardrobe are simple chores to get busy with.
  9. Adult doodle is a great way to pass the time. There are lots of inspirational doodle books around, these are great for lifting your spirits and as you color in the pages imagine your life being beautified by your little one.
  10. positive affirmation. this a way of focusing on the positive and a good practice to engage in, long after IVF. Simply refuse to dwell on the negative, you have nothing to loose and everything to gain by being positive so be full of hope.

Above all hold on to hope, you have come this far there is no need to worry now.
Seek out your support net work, it may be that one friend or a group you are path of, be in constant communication with them so as not to allow your self to drift off into negative and panicking territory.

The journey stared with that first push of the needle and will end with a beautiful baby.

Your Partner in Hope

D’Ebi

Relevant Post

https://faithfulwait.com/2019/09/27/ivf-process-step-by-step/

https://faithfulwait.com/2019/05/29/the-pain-of-miscarriage/

https://faithfulwait.com/2018/08/13/single-women-and-ivf/

https://faithfulwait.com/2017/12/06/fearful-wait/