What’s In A Name.

Choosing a name for your child will be one of the most exciting things you will have to do while you wait. 

We didn’t pick names until we were expecting and even then, we waited well into the pregnancy, and only decided on names after our babies were born. 

Some already know what to call their new born. It maybe a family name. A name after a grandparent, or someone important whom they want to honour by naming their child after them.

Mary and Joseph had no such problem. The name of Jesus was chosen by God. They didn’t have to debate or research appropriate names for Him.

God chose the name “Jesus” because his name was to be exactly what it means.

  1. Jesus – saviour. 

  1. Immanuel – God with us. 

  1. Wonderful Counsellor – one who guides and leads His children in the right path 

  1. The Everlasting Father. – a father who is there all all times 

  1. The prince of Peace. – Does exactly want it says. He brings us peace. 

As you ponder over the name for your child, think on the name of Christ. 

What does He mean to you? 

Infertility is a name but the name of Jesus is “wonderful counsellor, he will counsel you in making the right choices.

He will be with you during dark and disappointing days.

He will be your “prince of peace” during the turmoil of your infertility journey. 

As you await another surgery,. Think of  His name,

“God With Us”. He is Always With Us holding you and working out his best plans for you. 

As you contemplate the future wondering if it will ever come to pass. Remember He is the prince of peace. Invite His peace into your heart. 

His peace passes all understanding, You will be at peace with your future because he who brings peace will never leave you and will bring His Perfect plan for you to be.  

This Christmas, know that the name of Jesus is more than a name, His name is the everlasting father. Always there, loving, caring, comforting. 

Wishing You all a Merry Christmas 

Your Partner in Hope.

D’Ebi. 

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Good News of Great Joy

And the angel said to them, do not be afraid for I bring you good news of great joy. Luke 2:10

Expecting something and receiving it does not diminish the we joy we get from the gift.

My kids always write their Christmas list. they pretty much know what gifts they will receive on Christmas day. Receiving it doesn’t stop them from being excited.

I also know what I will receive and I am always excited to unwrap the paper and see my chosen gift.

The angels announced the gift that will bring us good news of great joy.

The promised Advent. saviour brought great Joy. His arrival did not diminish the joy felt when the angel saw him.

This is a sign that whatever promises we are expecting, and holding on to, it will be one that will bring great joy.

Though the wait may seem long as the years roll on, hold on to his promises for when it comes, it will be one of great joy.

The length of the wait will not diminish the joy that comes with the promise.

Just hold on, look with expectations to the promise that is coming which will bring great joy.

Your Partner in Hope.

D’Ebi

Related post

Advent: Day 7, His perfect plan.

Our Hope This Easter

Christmas promise

Advent: Day 7, His perfect plan.

Continuing on in the season of advent 

Joseph  thought he’d lost control of the situation 

When the young girl he was to be wedded found out she was pregnant.  

Her parents felt she had brought shame on them.

Both families I imagine, felt they had lost control of the situation. 

Their well laid plans appear to be in shambles. 

Like most parents, I imagined they questioned why.

“Why does he have to choose us”?, 

“How can we be so sure she’s carrying the messiah? 

“Who will believe she had a visit from the angel”?

Infertility, miscarriage, endometriosis, blocked tubes has scattered your best laid plans and presented you with an an uncertain future. 

Your diagnosis isn’t very good, although you continue to hold on. And it seems, the longer the wait the weaker your faith. you become unsure sure how much longer you can hold on.

Mary and Joseph didn’t know what was happening but chose to trust God’s plans.  His plans have a way of unfolding and working out for our good.

Maybe not exactly the way we expected, but in the end for our good. 

God could have waited for Mary and Joseph to be married before coming via a legitimate route. giving legitimacy to Christ’s birth, but he chose another way. 

It turns out His way was better than their plans. His plans unfolded right before their eyes and in the end was better than.

Your path towards parenting will unfold at the right time. Right now it seems like it may not happen, as you are faced with one setback after another. Continue to hope in God, this hope is not a wish but a certainty in the fulfilling of your heart’s desire.

This Christmas look to Jesus to find enduring hope and lasting peace.

Commit your worries and fears to hIm, your doubts cannot stop His plans from coming to pass. Nothing will.

He will bring His joy right into your situation and rest your heart while you wait. 

Your partner in Hope

D’Ebi

Wishes vs Hope:

Joy After 𝗣𝗮𝗶𝗻

Advent.

Every year we enter this season but do you know what advent means?

During advent,  we reflect on the events leading up to the birth of Jesus. 

2020 is a year like no other, we all were affected by the pandemic in  different ways.

For those in waiting advent is the perfect time to reflect on all our needs, hopes and desires. 

More than wishing to be with families and friends we long for the fulfillment of our dream to hold our precious child: 

As we enter into a season of advent ponder on this verse in Isaiah 9:1.

If your heart is heavy think on these Nevertheless, there will be no more gloom for those who were in distress.

Do you feel like you are walking in the dark with no light in sight?

be encouraged for “The people walking in darkness have seen a great light”;

Do you feel like there is no reason to be joyful? 

rejoice because He the Lord have enlarged the nation and increased their joy”;

So on this advent, flip on the switch of hope and hold onto the promise that the  messiah’s birth brings. His birth. advent reminds of of the hope his birth brings, His promises are sure, you can hold on to them. 

Your Partner in Hope 

Joy After 𝗣𝗮𝗶𝗻

Related post.

https://faithfulwait.com/2017/12/01/the-christmas-promised/

https://faithfulwait.com/2020/05/31/we-are-faced-with-one-of-the-worse-pandemic-in-modern-time-with-this-comes-the-uncertainty-faced-by-millions-of-couples-waiting-for-their-own-families-the-resilience-of-humans-to-cope-and-weather-t/

I Remember

Today I remember a time when I celebrated birthdays without a child.

When no one made a card for me with scrap papers, scribbled writings and drawings that bears no resemblance to me..

When all I had was a kind and loving husband who will give me the world just to dull the pain of childlessness.

Today, I call to mind those days and it is hard to think back.

I had to pull up pictures of my days without kids. When each birthday I said a little prayer

“Lord let this be the year”..

Today I smile because this day this very moment. I am on top of the world, I am blessed with two beautiful girls.

Today, I heard a sound in my downstairs study and went to investigate

As I opened the door, my six year old screamed

“Mummy you can’t come in”. She was serious, so I retreated.

I knew what she was doing, I caught a glimpse of her making a birthday card for me.

A few minutes later big sister joined her and she called out “mummy whatever you do, DO NOT COME INTO THE STUDY”!

Ok I replied.

I observed as they tiptoed around the house to get items for their cards.

It warmed my heart.

My two little blessings with love in their heart making a birthday card for me.

There is no greater joy.

So today I celebrate with a heart filled with joy and gratitude for this wonderful blessing.

Today I pray for you, that you will come to know the joy of motherhood, that soon the ache you feel will be replaced by pangs of labour.

Your tears will be of joy and unspeakable blessings on beholding your child.

So do not give up.

Do not despair

Do not fear.

This is a journey that will end with rainbows in the skies.

Look up child, soon your blessings will make this wait worth it.

Your Partner in Hope

D’Ebi

Post to Note

https://faithfulwait.com/2019/03/26/trust-and-joy-in-the-mist-of-pain/

https://faithfulwait.com/2019/03/30/i-see-you/

https://faithfulwait.com/2019/02/24/strengthened-not-faulty/

Trust and Joy in the mist of pain

Mother’s Day and infertility

Celebration of mother is approaching in the UK. On the 31 March we will celebrate and acknowledge mothers

The airwaves, Churches, schools will put up a show to celebrate mothers. It is fitting to do this.

This is a particularly difficult time for anyone who’s trying to conceive.

As you watch others being celebrated a part of you always wonders when you too will be celebrated.

Celebrating mother’s on this day doesn’t take away from what you are experiencing.

If anything this celebration makes me focus even more on my demise. However dark and grim the situation may seem. Let me encourage you to focus on this one truth. This too will pass.

How and when I do not know. Let your trust be fully placed on the master.

Be reminded of this.

Habakkuk 3:17-19 

Though the fig tree do not blossom,

    nor fruit be on the vines,

the produce of the olive fail

    and the fields yield no food,

the flock be cut off from the fold

    and there be no herd in the stalls, 

yet I will rejoice in the Lord,

    I will joy in the God of my salvation. 

God, the Lord, is my strength;

    he makes my feet like hinds’ feet,

    he makes me tread upon my high places.

Re phrased it becomes

Thought my body will not respond to treatments and my monthly flow remains uncertain

Thought my womb refuse to yield and bear children as I get on in age.

My eyes will remain fixed on the Lord who is my strength. He alone will carry me and bring me into His perfect plan for me.

Sometimes we go through seasons of hardship, loss and deep pain. But no matter what we’ve lost, or wanted but never had, we can like Habakkuk rejoice in our relationship with a loving God.

Even when it feels like we have nothing else, He will never fail or abandon us.

He is the One who “provides for those who grieve His is our ultimate reason for joy (Isaiah 61:3).

Don’t endure Mother’s Day, celebrate it by fixing your eyes on him who loves you beyond reason.

Celebrate the unique experience of waiting and the worthiness of what he is fashioning within you.

Celebrate the person your are becoming as a result of the experiences you are face with

Your Partner in Hope

D’Ebi


Related post

https://faithfulwait.com/2017/03/25/celebrating-mothers-day/

https://faithfulwait.com/2018/03/11/how-to-handle-the-pressures-of-mothers-day/

Identity

Anyone who has ever suffered infertility knows too well the roller coaster of emotions they go through.

One minute you are full of hope and happy the next minute you see a pregnant woman and everything changes.

I am not certain any other illness do this to anyone, maybe it does. For me having experience infertility as well as Other illnesses. I find that I am most affected by infertility than any other illness.

Why is this so? Maybe because having a child is a build in desire. A desire to birth, to want to procreate seems to trump any other desire.

Life has season, our seasons of infertility will come and go.

Weather we will be gifted with a child in the way we desire tile will tell.

But whatever the path we take to a new season, we must keep our identity in view.

We are not define by infertility, do not make it your identity, Do not class yourself as an infertile woman/man.

You are gifted with abilities and potentials, crafted in the image of the maker of the universe.

Delicately and wonderfully  made,

Living in the abundance of His grace,

Wrapped in His beauty,

Fashioned with the best of His storehouse.

Here are ways to help you stay focus on who you are in Christ.

  1. Stay connected to God, being connected to God and the word will help you grasp who you are in Christ.The enemies of our souls knows this and wants us to only keep in focus the lies about who we are. if you believe you are worthless unable to parent a child, you will be unable to lay hold on the promises of God’s word concerning children. Staying connected to the word about who you are

  2. Speak positively about your situation, speak life to your body, claim the promises available to you as you stay connected, you will begin to have a new reality.

  3. The battle is ongoing  to remind yourself of who you are, set reminders throughout the day by immersing  your love in God’s truth. Put memory verses in your car, in your purse. Set reminders on your phone with encouraging quotes to remind you of your identity..

  4. Avoid events or issues that might draw you away from God! Draw near to Him throughout the day. By doing this you will be able to resist the temptation to give in to your emotions when those ugly thoughts about your infertility rears their head, you can chop it off with the word of God.

The battle is not over until we win. We will win because the word says so. So set your mind free from fear and live in the hope of coming into Hos promises for your life.

Your Partner in Hope

D’Ebi

Encouraging post

https://faithfulwait.com/2018/11/22/joy-after-%f0%9d%97%a3%f0%9d%97%ae%f0%9d%97%b6%f0%9d%97%bb/

https://faithfulwait.com/2018/03/04/do-you-call-it-quits/

Joy After 𝗣𝗮𝗶𝗻

I have previous written about the struggles of Gabriella Union  (46) in my post

speak out”.

In her interview to pure woman she told a heartbreaking story of going through 7-8 miscarriage. What pain she must have gone through. .

She found out that she has adenomyosis, which is endometriosis of the uterus. It occurs when the endometrial tissue, the same tissue that lines the uterus, grows into the the muscular wall of the uterus, causing intense period pain, prolonged and heavy menstrual bleeding and, in severe cases like Union’s, infertility.

Union did not give up, and than masked the problem which she felt they were doing by advising her to go on the pills, she felt the problem where being masked.

Fast forward to November 7 she and her husband Dwayne Wade  welcomes a beautiful Miracle baby girl via surrogacy.

Her Instagram post is one of pure joy. You can tell that although the road leading to this was littered with pain and tears it was also hope and faith filled.

She did not give up, when her body said no, she sought other option, surrogacy.

A cation on one of her Instagram post was “This little dynamo reminds me to never give up on my dreams “.

I wanted to share this story with you because it is one of faith, hope, and the miracle of having a baby against all odds.

You too maybe at a point where it seems all Hope is lost, you have tried and tried but still nothing seems to be happening.

Don’t give up, try and try again.

Explore the options available to you, do hide away in grief. Speak out. And seek help..

You deserve a baby you deserve to experience the joy of that first smile and many more afterwards. .

Joy and and hope is not the presence of a few.you too can and I hope will become a mum as you with hope, faith and vigor try one more time.

If you want to know more about surrogacy please see previous post here

Your Partner in Hope

D’Ebi

FaithfulWait: A Reflective Journal for Those in Waiting.

Waiting can sometimes be long or short, regardless of the length of time, and depending on what we are waiting for it can be heartbreaking and disheartening. While waiting to have a baby I journaled a lot.

I had no specific or dedicated journal to write in I just wrote on anything I can grab my hands on.

I wanted to have a journal Faithful wait where I can collate all my thoughts. I realised while waiting that there was a need for something to write down our thoughts. Hence this journal.

This journal is design to encourage those who are currently waiting for one thing or another. Waiting is difficult and can be isolating, painful and leads to discouragement.

Using quotes and scriptures, this journal relays a message of comfort, hope and active focus, whilst in the corridors of waiting.

It also has an area where you can capture your thoughts and write down daily positive affirmations for yourself.

I hope that the clear, simple, short weekly read will encourage those waiting for any issue. Order now Faithful wait

Happy Readin😘

Your Partner in Hope

D’Ebi

To Adopt or Not.

I previously wrote about the various options towards becoming a parent. One of such option is adoption.

Adoption brings as much joy to a couple as if they had conceived the child themselves, in adoption a parent opens up their heart to receive another human. For whatever reason the child has become separated from their birth parents and need a loving home to be nurtured.

In Adoption, a child is conceived in the hearts, not the womb.

I personally think that adoption is the most loving, selfless and beautiful act anyone can perform.

I am reminded of the story of Joseph “the father” of Jesus. As he secretly planned to do away with Mary to avoid the shame brought about by her pregnancy.

The angel of God appeared to him and commanded him to raise Jesus as his own. He was told to adopt the son of God.

Having been told by an angel I am sure he still had some questions but he was assured by the fact that, God has a plan in his story.

As you consider your options, I pray that the Holy Spirit will reveal his plans for you and direct your steps to the best options toward fulfilling your dreams.

Some couples have disagreed on adoption as an option and this has led to the break down of their marriages.

If you are one of such people, my heart goes out to you. I pray that you will soon find someone who will share the same vision as you. If you desire to go it alone…May your strength be multiplied.

As you reflect on the Christmas story, remember Jesus was adopted by Joseph.

Whatever option you take towards becoming a parent may it bring you be peace and joy.

Your Partner in Hope.

D’Ebi

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